May 1 – May 7, 2011 is National Children’s Mental Health Awareness Week. This week, which was established in 1949 by the National Mental Health Association, is dedicated to the promotion of positive mental health, well being, social and emotional development of children and teens.
Many times parents, doctors and teachers forget that part of healthy development includes emotional health. The importance of family, caretakers, teachers and peers in healthy emotional development cannot be understated.
While mental health issues in children can be serious, with early intervention and proper care, children can still grow to live healthy, successful and fulfilling lives.
Here a few things that you can do to help a child improve his/her emotional health:
Reduce prenatal stress. Healthy emotional development starts in the womb and increased prenatal stress is associated with infants who are more fussy and more difficult to soothe. Children of mothers who are stressed during pregnancy are more likely to be anxious, shy, have difficulty making friends, and have a more difficult time adapting to changes. (Read more about prenatal stress and child development.)
Reduce marital conflict. Children as young as newborns can tell when there is conflict in the air, especially between their parents. Children who witness any type of conflict, whether it be parents ignoring each other to screaming at each other, and everything I between, are more likely to experience high levels of stress and anxiety. They are more likely to also have repeated nightmares, complain of physical ailments often, and get into altercations with their peers at school. Infants, children and teens report a change in eating and sleeping patterns and can show signs of depression. (Read more about marital conflict and child development.)
Model appropriate and strong conflict resolving strategies. Children are like sponges and absorb everything they see and hear. If a child grows up watching their parents resolve conflict in a healthy manner, they begin to internalize the correct model for navigating difficult situations. Most of the time, children who have conflict resolution problems with their peers or siblings come from homes where the parents have unhealthy conflict management strategies too. (Here are a list of articles on marital conflict and successful resolutions.)
Model healthy emotion regulation. If a child sees his parent panicking, he will learn that panic is the normal response to a stressful situation. Instead, calm yourself down and work through a problem calmly. As you are finding a solution, you may want to talk through the steps you are taking in your head so your child knows how to think through a difficult problem. If you think you might be depressed, feeling anxious, highly stressed or if you have a more serious mental health concern, visit a mental health professional for appropriate treatment and to address your coping strategies. An emotionally healthy parent raises an emotionally healthy child.
Listen to your child. Infants give cues about what they want by crying. Eventually they learn to gesture and speak. Children and teens are always giving parents feedback, both verbally and nonverbally, about what they need and want from their parents. Listen to your child and know that if you have more than one, each child is entirely different even if they are the same gender. If one child requires more hugs and kisses, another may thrive on positive verbal feedback. Allow your child to help you become the best parent you can be. (Although originally meant for couples, love languages also can apply to the parent-child relationship as well. Read more here.)
Dedicate significant time to play. With the increased pressure of academic success, playtime for children has significantly diminished over the course of 15 years. Just as adults process things by talking, children process by playing. To develop strong academic, social, cognitive and emotional skills, children need significant time to engage in creative, spontaneous play. Playtime at all ages from newborn to young teens encourages brain development that is necessary to be successful at their age and as they grow older. This should not include structured extracurricular activities such as practicing an instrument or playing on a soccer team. Examples of play include playing with blocks, coloring, writing a story, playing with dolls, role-playing games with peers outside of school, etc. Through play, the child learn about his body, his surroundings and the world. Studies have shown that children, even those who are very intelligent, do more poorly on academic tests if they do not have adequate play time built into their days.
Know when to ask for help. As a parent, you know your child best. And if your parent-detector is going off telling you something may not be right with your child, get a consultation. Early intervention and treatment for emotional issues is key to living a successful, healthy life. Emotional health is a very real and significant part of your child’s overall health and as a parent it is just as important to educate yourself of the warning signs of depression as it is the chicken pox.
Just because a child is smiling or succeeding academically does not mean he is emotionally healthy. Truly happy, healthy children come from families where their emotional health are prioritized just as much as their physical health. This week, take a step back and look at how you are addressing your child’s emotional needs and identify places for improvement. For more information and tips, visit your pediatrician or find a mental health professional specializing in children.
What do you do to encourage healthy emotional development in your children? Leave a comment below.