For some children and teens, going back to school can be a highly anxiety provoking experience. They may count down the days as the first day of school approaches, losing sleep with each night, worrying about how it will go and dreading the day they have to walk into a new classroom or lecture hall.
Sometimes this anxiety stems from years of being behind if they have special needs, learning disabilities or academic challenges. Other children might have experienced bullying or other difficult social situations that they dread going through again.
Regardless of if your child is starting first grade or if you are going back to college, here are some tips on how to reduce school anxiety and make the transition back to school a little bit easier.
- Acknowledge the problem. Don’t tell your child or yourself to stop worrying. There can be so much pressure to perform a certain way that our minds become flooded with “shoulds” and “should nots”. Being mindful of the reality of the situation will help remove pressure and help increase a sense of calmness.
- Identify what are the three biggest worries. Anxiety is an overwhelming and amorphous emotion that has specific causes we are sometimes not aware of. By consciously focusing on specific sources of anxiety, the triggers will begin to feel smaller and more predictable which can help reduce anxiety.
- Identify three most positive aspects of going to school. When we feel anxiety, we often filter out other message that we are receiving from our environment, including positive ones. Forcefully thinking of three concrete positive aspects of returning to school can challenge the overwhelmingly negative and inflexible thinking that can accompany anxiety. It aids with getting perspective and helps to identify positive things to look forward to or to rely on even if the anxiety creeps back while in school.
- Keep a memento in your backpack. A picture of your mother, a favorite toy or your sister’s ring can all be reminders that life exists beyond this anxiety-provoking situation. In addition, it is a reminder of positive sentiments which can override or dampen feelings of worry and fear.
- Keep a schedule. Sometimes anxiety is reduced best by remembering that the feared situation will not exist forever. For young students, showing them on the clock when they will return home can give the child a sense of boundaries and limits to the anxiety which is crucial. Similarly, for adolescents, keep a copy of your class schedule so you will always know when a particular class will be over or when you get to return back home.
- Keep a list of successes. Remind yourself (or your child) consistently throughout the day of all the things that have gone well. People with high anxiety tend to have low self-esteem which can perpetuate the anxiety. Keeping the list in the backpack or leaving a surprise note in your child’s lunchbox can be a concrete reminder of positive qualities in them.
- Make friends with a teacher or trusted adult. Knowing that you have an ally at school can make all the difference. Children can visit that teacher during lunch or college students can visit the adult outside of class knowing that it is a safe place they can retreat to if the anxiety becomes too overwhelming.
Anxiety is a powerful emotion that is very difficult to shake off. While there are many different strategies to reduce anxiety finding what works for you will yield the best and most long-lasting results. Most importantly, don’t blame yourself or your child for being afraid. Just remember that you have done it before and you can do it again.
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